Responsive design has been a blessing to web crafters everywhere. The web, however, was meant to be read, not squished. jquery.wanker.js is a tiny (549 bytes minified) jQuery plugin that reveals a public service announcement when people start excessively resizing their desktop browser as they try to see your responsive breakpoints.

jquery.wanker.js is an easter egg plugin for designers, photographers, writers, and anyone else with a sense of humor displaying their work on the web wishing their viewers to focus more on their work, and less on the magic of media queries.

See it in action

You can see a live example here.

Setup, design, and usage

First, include jQuery and the plugin:

<head>
  <script src="/assets/javascript/jquery.min.js"></script>
  <script src="/assets/javascript/jquery.wanker.min.js"></script>
</head>

Write a public service announcement:

<div class="wanker" data-wanker>
  <div class="wanker-content">
    <h1>The web was meant to be read, not squished.</h1>
    <p>Prevent excessive browser resizing and get people back to reading.</p>
    <p>Download <a href="https://github.com/migreyes/jquery.wanker">jquery.wanker.js on GitHub</a>.</p>
  </div>
</div>

Design the message, and hide it by default:

.wanker {
  /* Full-screen takeover… */
  background: #000;
  color: #FFF;
  display: none;
  height: 100%;
  left: 0;
  position: fixed;
  top: 0;
  width: 100%;
  z-index: 2014;
}

.wanker-content {
  /* Additional design… */
}

Last, just call the wanker() function on your design.

$(function() {
  $('[data-wanker]').wanker();
});

Want the message to start sooner and last longer?

$(function() {
  // Customize the delay or duration defined in milliseconds
  $('[data-wanker]').wanker({delay: 0, duration: 5000});
});

Get it now

Fork me on GitHub, or get the minified version now.

Spread the good word

Tweet about jquery.wanker.js on Twitter.

 

👉 🤔 👈

These words want to be read, not squished.